Sunday, May 16, 2021

Ranking KISS: 1978 Solo Albums

  Awhile back, I reviewed all twenty Kiss studio albums (here and here), and said at the end that I would eventually get around to reviewing the 1978 solo albums and maybe also the live albums. 

I have since decided to no longer review the live stuff. I recognize that those records are an important part of Kiss’s legacy, but if I review them, then I would most likely feel obligated to review live records from other bands in the future as well, and that’s a rabbit hole I’d rather not go down. That being said, I figured that I should still at least touch on these four obscure records in particular. So that’s what we’re going to do, right here and right now…


So for those who don’t know: In 1978, lead guitarist Ace Frehley almost quit Kiss (he would end up quitting for real in 1982 anyways), saying that he wanted to make a solo album. The band’s manager at the time then stepped in and said “You don’t have to quit, Ace. Let’s all do solo albums!” And thus, the infamous 1978 Kiss solo albums were born. As one would probably expected, Gene Simmons’s record sold the most at first (he’s always been the most popular member by far), but over time, Ace’s ended up being the only successful release of the bunch (both critically and financially). While I personally feel that all four members of the classic line-up were talented enough to write and/or perform good (if not great) songs, I agree with the majority of people out there that Ace’s record ended up being the only stellar one of the bunch. However, there are two other LP’s here that I think are okay, and only one that I think is bad, and it may surprise you which are which.


I usually try not to rank things on this blog, but I decided to make an exception for this, since there are only four records here, and I feel pretty confident now that my feelings on all of them won’t change any time soon. So, without further ado, let’s rank the 1978 Kiss solo albums! Starting with…


4.Gene Simmons


Yeah, the one that initially sold the most at first is, ironically, my least-favorite of the bunch, and the only one that I think is a genuinely bad album. The record actually starts off strong with lead single Radioactive, and the ballad See You Tonite, but the other songs on the first half (Burning Up with Fever, Tunnel of Love, True Confessions) all sound the same as one another. Doesn’t help that the backing-vocalist girls are mixed so loud that I can barely even hear Gene on his own songs. Then the second half kicks off with Living In Sin, that really weird song where then-girlfriend Cher makes a random phone call in the middle. That one is followed by Always Near You/ Nowhere to Hide, a title so creepy-sounding that it makes me not want to even listen to the song itself. Then we get Man of a Thousand Faces, which always sounded to me like a shameless ripoff of Lou Reed’s Walk on the Wild Side. Then there’s Mr. Make Believe, which is just okay. That’s followed by See You In Your Dreams, an inferior remake of a song that was already on Kiss’s Rock And Roll Over. Lastly, we get When You Wish Upon a Star. Yes, the Disney song. Gene did that. Why? Who the fuck knows! This whole album sounds super lazy and uninspired…


3.Peter Criss


Sigh… Yes, I know this is the album of the bunch that everyone else hates to pieces (and not Gene’s). And for awhile, I couldn’t get into this record either. This is not the same Peter Criss that tore it up vocally on tracks like Black Diamond, Strange Ways, Baby Driver, etc. But you know what? That’s okay! He wanted to make a Rod Stewart type of album, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I actually think the first six tracks on here, as well as the closing number Can’t Stop The Rain, are all pretty solid. Unfortunately, it’s the other three songs towards the end (Rock Me Baby, Kiss the Girl Goodbye, Hooked On Rock ’N’ Roll) that castrate the album. Those three tracks are some of the most repetitive pieces of crap I’ve ever heard. Had he cut those three out and replaced them with another cover or something, then this album would easily rank above the next one on the list…


2.Paul Stanley


Let me say one thing first: Paul Stanley, despite his flaws, is a very, very good songwriter. Most of my favorite Kiss songs of all time are the ones he brought to the table. And this record is actually almost great… Almost! The songwriting is not really the problem. As a matter of fact, I think all of these songs stand surprisingly well on their own. Yes, I even like the super-cheesy ones like Together As One and Hold Me, Touch Me. The problem is that, at least lyrically, the record as a whole feels super inconsistent to me. It seems like Paul’s head was in two places at once, as the entire LP alternates back and forth between love songs and breakup songs. It’s like he can’t make up his mind about whether he likes a certain girl, or if he wants her to fuck off. And maybe that was intentional, but even if so, it still doesn’t make for a great album-listening experience, in my opinion. A simple re-arranging of the song order would’ve probably worked wonders. And yes, I know that the real reason the songs are in the order they are is because this is really two different EPs, recorded with two different session bands, in two different studios. But production-wise, all of these tracks sound similar enough that I don’t think mixing up the order would’ve caused any major issues. UPDATE: On second thought, maybe it’s best to just imagine that he’s singing about a different girl on each track…


1.Ace Frehley


Do I even need to explain myself here? This album is great, and everyone knows it! Every single song is rock solid. I can play this album dozens of time over to this day, and it still doesn’t get old. No wonder Ace wanted to make a solo album. He really had a lot of passionate musical energy to share here! If I had just one complaint, it would be that Ozone drags a bit. In my opinion, it either should’ve faded out earlier, or it should’ve had a more “climatic” ending. But that’s a minor complaint, at the end of the day…


…So there you have it! Interestingly enough, while I only really love one of these albums, I’m still glad Kiss did this. I know a lot of people say this four-album project was the beginning of the end for the original line-up, and while that may be true, I think that by 1978, the four of them needed to do something like this. I can’t really explain it in any other way than that. Either way, this all happened a long time ago, so it doesn’t really matter now anyways…


Peace!


UPDATE: Oh yeah, and if I absolutely had to condense all of this stuff down into one normal Kiss album, this is what I would go with (I made sure each side was less than the standard 22 minutes long, and tried to even things out between all four members as much as possible):


SIDE A

1.Tonight You Belong to Me

2.Rip It Out

3.See You Tonite

4.New York Groove

5.Ain’t Quite Right


SIDE B

6.Radioactive

7.You Matter to Me

8.Snow Blind

9.I Can’t Stop the Rain

10.Love in Chains


Furthermore, if I were them, I would’ve called the album Radioactive, and would’ve combined the portraits from the solo albums to make it look like all four members are standing in front of one another. Probably would’ve been a cool album, actually. Oh well…


No comments:

Post a Comment